CLINT AND NATASHA, STOP STEALING SAM AND STEVE’S THING. AND GET A ROOM ALREADY.
(Battle Scars #6, 2012)
My sexual orientation is fictional characters falling in love with each other.
wow first of all how do you even touch a bird
For when you find that specal someone
an eggagment ring
DELETE YOUR BLOG
Accurate post is accurate.
Reminds me of the time a lady told me whip doesn’t melt. Or a guy yelled at me for not understanding him/hearing him because he kept talking on the phone
For those in retail.
I worked in a Lil Caesars and a woman came in and wanted a sausage pizza with no sausage, but got mad when she was given a cheese pizza.
So when I worked at fitting room in Old Navy, a woman told me that a medium top was too small, and that the large top was too large. So she asked me to find her an “x-medium”. Old Navy carries x-small, small, medium, large, x-large, 1x, 2x and 3x. There is no “x-medium”. But she insisted, so I went and found her an “x-medium” (which was just a medium in a different color but the same top, same make, same EVERYTHING) and she goes very happily, “THIS! THIS FITS ME PERFECTLY! THANK YOU SO MUCH! See, you can do anything you can set your mind to!”
I’m a waitress at a big fancy resort, and once a woman asked me for a diet water and when I told her there was no such thing she demanded to see my manager (who then also promptly told her there was no such thing and brought her regular water).
Another occasion of stupidity occurred when a woman had been brought a steak cooked too much for her liking. I offered to take it back and bring her out a new one, cooked a little less, and she said “NO this one’s fine I just want you to cook THIS one a little less.” I then had to get the chef and have him explain why you can’t UNCOOK a steak.
When I was working at dunkin donuts there was this woman in the drive-thru who asked for a lightly toasted croissant and then started complaining that the croissant was warm. And wanted her money back, so she gave me the croissant back and I gave her the money and then she tells me “now i want my new croissant” she wanted a new one for free and as she was screaming at me this guy in a biker gang covered in tattoos leans over the counter in the store and yells “ma’am let me just tell you what we’re all thinking. fuck off, you stupid ****.” I couldn’t stop laughing and she drove away in anger.
Most of the people like in the stories above know that they’re being totally irrational, but also know that if they complain enough they’ll most likely get something free or discounted. So really most of the the nonsensical fucks are actually just cheap fucks with no shame or respect for people.
That last bit of commentary though.
A Dutch designer is working with scientists to create glow-in-the-dark trees, hoping to one day use them in place of street lights. Source
YOURE SO WELCOME. avengingsuperwholock was doing a Swarkles spam and I was more than happy to jump on board. THAT FINALE NEVER HAPPENED.
THE SHOW ENDED WITH TED AND TRACY TOGETHER LIVING HAPPILY WITH THEIR TWO AWESOME CHILDREN. TRACY EVEN OUTLIVED TED. IT WAS SAD, AND SHE NEVER REMARRIED. SHE EVEN CONTINUED THE STAR WARS TRADITIONS WITH THE GUYS AFTER TEDS DEATH.
LILY AND MARSHAL STAYED IN NEW YORK AND MARSHAL BECAME A JUDGE. LILY CONTINUED PAINTING AND EVENTUALLY STARTED SELLING HER PIECES ON THE SIDE. THEY MAKE A MORE THAN MODEST LIVING AND THEY BOUGHT A PENTHOUSE IN THE CITY. THEY NOW HAVE 4 CHILDREN. ALL OF WHOM ARE HAPPY AND HEALTHY. THEY’RE EXPECTING THEIR FIRST GRANDCHILD. HIS MIDDLE NAME WILL ALSO BE “WAIT FOR IT”.
NOW I HAVE TWO SWARKLES HEADCANONS.
1. THEY SPEND THE REST OF THEIR LIVES TRAVELING THE WORLD AND FINDING NEW ADVENTURES. TOGETHER. CANNOT EMPHASIZE THAT ENOUGH. BARNEY ORGANIZES THE WORLDS LARGEST LASER TAG TOURNAMENT. WHICH ROBIN WINS. SHE WINS BECAUSE SHE FLASHES HER BOOBS AT BARNEY. HE DOESN’T MIND LOSING.
2. If you actually admit that the finale happened… this is for you.
Barney has actually been working for S.H.I.E.L.D. for years.
S.H.I.E.L.D loves their acronyms, hence: P.L.E.A.S.E.
Anyways, Barney eventually discovered that Robin was also working for SHIELD but in a different branch/division. He spent the next few years trying to get her to slip up. They’d been married a few years when she was charged with keeping this baby girl safe and she didn’t want to risk anyone finding out about her secret identity or endanger the lives of her friends. Specifically she didn’t want to endanger Barney. So she was in the middle of telling him that she was leaving him (for some bullshit reason) when he called her out on it. They agreed to not tell their friends and instead to “Divorce” in order to keep the baby safe and Barney safe- cuz you know, Robin can handle herself.
They’re still living happily together, off the radar.
All of those girls Barney was ‘hooking up with’ were really just S.H.I.E.L.D bodyguards that Robin insisted he take with him whenever he went into New York, cuz for some reason New York is always where shit goes down.
It’s a lot of work just to live their double life. But it’s all worth it.
I’m an orphan raised by carnies fighting with a stick and a string from the Paleolithic era.
Paleolithic. I looked it up.
”I have really bad experiences with big fandoms, but Deadman Wonderland just deserves to get its anime back and become extremely popular. For DWs sake, I would effortlessly put up with the worst fandom in the world.”
The Question: “[Name], would you please sign my boobies?”
Mark Sheppard: “Yes.” [proceeds to label them “right” and “left” with a little grin on his face, then signs.]
Misha Collins: “Of course…wait. Those are - they’re actually called boobies. I was gonna ask you to walk away, but - are these real? This isn’t photoshopped?” [signs name]
Sebastian Roche: “I would love to sign your boobies. These are magnificent boobies. Galapagos Islands, did you know? Oh. It’s labeled right here. Well, I knew that. I want you to know I knew that.” [signs “To Jamie" and then draws boobies on the booby]
Felicia Day: “I was going to do something inappropriate, but I would never do something inappropriate to another woman’s boobies.” [“Jamie! xxoo”]
Richard Speight, Jnr: “Yes. Excellent. This is a welcome addition to Porncouver.” [“Jamie! Sweet Boobies! You rock Porncouver!”]
Jensen Ackles: [bows head over table, shoulders shaking with laughter for ten whole seconds] “Yes. Oh god. Ah. Which booby would you like me to sign? Here, I’ll sign the right one for you. Boobies. Oh god.” [signs name]
Jared Padalecki: “Oh my god, yes. I want to sign your boobies.” [Cliff cracks up in the background. A flimsy table is pounded with a gleeful fist.] “Here, I’ll sign the nice meaty part of this one.” [signs name]
And with that, the Great Booby Saga of 2013 draws to a close.
I’m getting this framed.
BOOBIES 2014 REDUX
Adam Rose: [buries face in elbow, dislodges trilby hat giggling] “That’s a first. Oh wow. That’s hilarious. Here? Is that okay? Oh wow. Boobies. Hah.” [signs name]
Osric Chau: “I get to sign the boobies!” [turns to people standing around] “This made her Tumblr famous, you know.” [signs “Yes we will!” and his name]
Tahmoh Penikett: [smirks] “That is clever. And funny. Shall I sign your — no.” [laughs, shakes his head, signs his name]